Saturday, September 20, 2008

Intention

My car is acting up. It overheated on August 11th as I was bringing my daughter home from the hospital after surgery. My brother came to my rescue with engine coolant, and it has been pretty much fine since then. Until it overheated again earlier this week, and only went back to normal when I turned the air conditioning off. No problem. But then on Friday night as I was taking my child home from school, it overheated for no reason (air off, had only been running for about 5 minutes, not unusually hot outside, and I was driving at low speeds). I stopped at the store immediately and bought some coolant, filled up the tank, and thought the problem would go away. No luck... I was overheating again by the time I pulled into my garage 10 minutes later.

So, I felt trapped this morning. Afraid to drive my car because of the issue, but unable to afford the repair (which is a leak in my water pump, diagnosed two weeks ago at the car dealership). And when I felt trapped, I felt depressed. And the house is messy and that depressed me even more. Add to that no healthy food in the house because I need to do my grocery shopping this weekend, and a bad situation was brewing.

I started eating junk. Craving DD's frosted strawberry pop tarts. I was sitting around thinking about food, and not anything calorie-friendly. I was supposed to go to the gym to do W4D3 of OHR, but I was crabby and feeling trapped and having gastro-intestinal issues from all of the junk that I ate today. I saw a binge staring me in the face as I visited my cabinets and fridge over and over again just looking for trouble.

So I decided to get my workout clothes on, get in the car, and roll the dice with overheating. I figured that I could pull over and let it cool off midway there if need be because the gym is only about 2 miles away. And off we went.

The car made it there without overheating, so one good thing happened for the day! Then I hit the track, and did I ever feel ungainly. My right knee was hurting something fierce, and my left calf was very sore with each stride (why????). I could not get into a good rhythm, and felt like my pace must have been as slow as molasses by all of the people lapping me. Add to that the fact that this was my first 35 minute run after 4+ weeks of 30 minute runs, and things were not looking good for the run.

About 15 minutes into my 35 minute run, I was really doubting that I could finish all 35 minutes. I was even questioning 30 minutes, and was feeling bad thinking that this would be my first run since starting 12 weeks ago that I did not finish as planned. Then I remembered something that I have been hearing in the Inside Out Weight Loss podcasts that I have been listening to on the way home from work each day: Set Your Intention. So I set my intention for the rest of the run, that I would enjoy the rest of the run any way that it turned out.

And then I finished the full 35 minutes! Not every minute was enjoyable, but I came away with a sense of accomplishment and a pleasant memory of the run. And the biggest surprise of them all was that my pace was the best it has been in a couple of weeks! I deem this run a success. :-)

1 comment:

Delane said...

I said before, the only run anyone regrets is the one that they did not do.

WTG..sometimes we just need to suck-it-up and just do it.